By Captain Jack | 20/01/2021


“AHOY, shipmates!

“You might remember that my friends at Rotherham Civic Theatre have been telling you about the adventures of your favourite panto characters.

“Those pesky characters escaped from the theatre in December but I’m pleased to report that all of the villains have been accounted for.

“Fleshcreep, who made off with the town’s supply of beans, vanished to a south Pacific island to start an illegal beanstalk farm.

“Unfortunately for him the Komodo Dragons that lived on the island did not welcome the latest inhabitant and when our agents finally made it ashore they were greeted by a pile of bones on top of which sat Fleshcreep’s hat.

“The Wicked Queen was found to be selling highly toxic apple sauce from an ice cream van but fled when she knew the CBI were on her tail.

“Our thanks go to Agent Harrison for the toxicology report that might help with any future antidote should the poison be unexpectedly slipped into any other fruit-based product.

“Abanazar gave up his role as a goalkeeping coach at Rotherham United and moved to Tigres FC in Columbia where he continues to magically steer the ball away from goal.

“He is rumoured to be returning to Rotherham at the end of the year.

“Agents managed to use an incantation to turn the Evil Queen into stone, while King Rat turned himself in after illegally distributing cheese in the area.

“Reports say King Rat is now in a witness protection programme and has set up a wellness programme for those suffering with cheese addiction.

“The Kingpin’s lair was discovered in a disused basement of the Civic Theatre, but agents only found a prop skeleton and a budgie there.

“The budgie’s movements are suspicious and he seems to be trying to say “Who’s a pretty boy?!”

“As a thank you for all your help in capturing the villains, the Civic Theatre is offering ONE lucky Clipper Club member a family ticket to the opening night of this year’s pantomime, Aladdin.

“The ticket will be for four people on Saturday December 4, 2021 at 6.30pm.

“The competition will close on Sunday, February 28 and the winner will be chosen at random by Captain Jack.

“Tickets for Aladdin can now be purchased online at

“Good luck!”

You can join the Clipper Club here>>

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