Letter: Blair won without flat cap or Che Guevara tattoo

Unless my memory is fading faster than I reckon, the point I attempted to make was that Tony Blair won three general elections in a row and obviously knows a thing or two which might improve the party’s chances in 2020. All I’m suggesting is that Corbyn recognises his own limitations and asks someone much better equipped to help out.

Only joking, the left has hated him from the off. I mean, there were the brothers, perfectly content to enjoy the freedom which opposition provides, no responsibility, no need to make decisions, 18 uninterrupted years of having taken up their placards, marched in honourable protest, organised rallies, sat down, stood up, fist pumped, chanted and rioted. The ideal plan to disappear up their own collective bottoms working to perfection when, out of the blue, along comes this posh bloke who has the brass neck to blow the Tories away! What, in God’s name, was he doing?

Even worse, not only does he win by a landslide but it also appeared some traitorous comrades had clearly forgotten Labour was busy fighting a class war and were attracting huge numbers of votes from the sort of people the party detested. Winning in places like Hove and Hornchurch was simply unacceptable, where was the street cred in that? He had to go, this non-owner of either a pigeon or a whippet. Let alone a Che Guevara tattoo.

Only a closet Tory could have pulled such a stroke and how shallow was it he pretended to be otherwise by bringing in a minimum wage, introducing tax credits to help the worst off, investing hugely in our public services, controlling inflation and reducing unemployment. All of them affordable by growing the economy for 50 odd quarters in a row. Or his other various blue sky tinkerings like setting into law provisions on gay rights, a freedom of information act, maternal leave and a ban on hunting. Crime figures went down and exam results improved, damn it. As for Ireland, how dare he take any credit when it was clearly comrade Gerry Adams who had shown that armed struggle had paid off?

Whatever, in 2007 he was finally forced out (undefeated) by a collection of drunks working down the local pub to have their lord and master elevated to the highest office. And how well that worked out. Gordy, after three short years, was squashed flat, replaced by headstone Ed, squashed equally flat and the party is now lumbered with a leader in Corbyn who has the potential to demonstrate just how flat it is possible to be rendered before being better described as a lamina. A fate, should it ever happen to chief plum-duff Abbott, would provide enough material to carpet the entire globe and probably the moon.

Sadly I’ve yet to mention Livingstone because I can’t keep the tears of laughter out of my eyes when re-reading Paddy J’s opinion that he is a fantastic politician. I will get around to him eventually, however.

Ian Hoyle, Broom Valley Road, Rotherham