'Weirdly happy' – Self Esteem shares love life update with Rylan

The former Indie band singer turned solo performer/actress left little to the imagination on the How to Be in Love programme.

Previously, she has revealed she’s bisexual and unwilling to fall into society’s male-driven norms.

But the fact she is now in a relationship with a man she has nicknamed ‘Aunty’ was new to the public domain.

Rebecca – better known as Self Esteem – has been a fearless voice for women’s rights in showbiz for years.

Her song-writing tackles toxic relationships, bisexuality, break-ups, sex, and mental health.

The Anston-born star’s views are always uncompromising – they include a reference to extreme physical violence that some male partners are capable of. Here is a flavour of those in her session with Rylan.

On her first love:

“No one fancied me, and then finally, someone’s older brother liked this band, Bright Eyes, that I liked. He looked like Donnie Darko (a reference to a psychological thriller).

“He was lovely and I lost my virginity to him, to Hounds of Love by Kate Bush and it was really lovely and perfect.”

On what love feels like:

“The love before I had my enlightenment felt obsessive, like blood pumping and exciting and high octane.

“And then the love I now know, post-enlightenment, it feels like a tightening in my stomach that slowly gets looser and it’s sort of like, the road gets safer the more I fall in love.”

On her first female crush:

“I’m the same age as Lindsay Lohan, this sounds weird, but the American twin in Parent Trap, (1998 film) I was like, ‘I love her, I don’t know why’.”

On negative past relationships:

“All of the worst things that have ever happened to me were because of a dynamic that was created where I had no choice...I owed them and there was no way out.

“To not give what they wanted, my safety would be compromised.

“Ultimately men can f*****g kill you – so you do live your life constantly just trying to make sure that doesn’t happen.

“I refuse for it to take away my right to do what I want and be who I am.”

On her current boyfriend:

“I call him Aunty, because he likes dusting and folding and ironing and growing plants, so it’s sort of perfect because he’s quiet and I look after him but then he’s also tall and got a six-pack and everything.

“I can’t believe it. Absolutely not what I wanted.

“But here we are, and I’m weirdly happy, and I am being challenged by things I thought were definite truths.”